A nice day out.
I’ve spoken a bit about 2013 being the year from hell. Still no resolution on the David situation but hopefully, things happening soon. I will explain the full story once all is resolved but basically, he’s been living in this assessment centre since June. Work permitting, I bring him home at least once a week and also take him out on day trips. This week, it was an old local favourite – Dudley Zoo.
There you go, the flamingos, which are usually the first thing I see on my visits. However, not this time.
I’ve been going to the zoo all my life and on this occasion, I was surprised to see the famous chairlift, working. Wow! It had been closed for years and do you know, in nearly fifty years, even as a kid, I’d never been on.
Cue the big kid to take a ride … then come straight back down again.
Okay, we would have come straight back down again had it not been for jobsworth regulations.
As I approached the top, I asked the operator if we could simply remain in our chairs. No, was the reply. We had to get out, walk around, and queue the other side.
Why? The chair only went ten feet around a bend and you were ready to descend again. Arrrggghh! And there was nobody else waiting, either.
I didn’t get a photo of the top, but it’s identical to the the station at the bottom.
See, how difficult would it have been to let us stay in our seats and simply go round the corner?
Stupid regulations. God knows what reason there was for it but if somebody says health and safety, I shall hit them with a flamingo.
Also at the Zoo
Watching the sea lions, I heard a female voice behind me mocking the noise coming from the enclosure as whoever it was, approached.
‘Listen to them,’ she said. ‘ They sound like bloody seagulls.’
That’s because they are seagulls, dear. They were flying around trying to steal the fish.
It all went a bit wong …
I see Errol Damelin, founder of loan shark rip-off firm, Wonga, is getting divorced from his wife, Julie. My heart bleeds. Can’t feel any sympathy for somebody who makes his fortune on the back of the misery of others. It’s theft, nothing short of it how Wonga and hundreds of companies like it, operate. They will argue it’s all legal. I reckon that makes it more obscene.
Julie should, by all accounts, get a £15million pound payout from his stake in the company. What she doesn’t realise, she’ll have to repay £21million after 30 days.
Be careful where you land.
I was playing around on Google Maps the other day and decided to look at something on Street View.
It’s brilliant the way you can land on the street and I have on occasion, slipped into street view and gone for a five mile walk.
What? I took in the scenery and it gave my finger some exercise. What you frowning for?
However, dropping into street view can be a little hairy sometimes, especially if you are less than accurate where you place yourself. A slip of an inch, and you could find yourself in all sorts of trouble. Take last week, for instance, when I wanted to look at a road near the M6 motorway. I miscalculated and …
Yikes!!!!!
Hope nobody ever invents a teleport and puts me in charge of landings.
Warning – Allergy advice.
I came across a good one the other day.
You know on foodstuffs, there are often allergy notices. For instance – This product may contain nuts. Well, look at what I found this week.
Okay, simple box of a dozen eggs. Free range, too. However, if you look a little closer at the warning inside of the box.
Yes, apparently, it contains egg.
WTF? Of course it contains egg, they’re bloody eggs!!! What did you expect it to contain, peanut butter? It’s an egg. If I buy a carton of eggs, I don’t envisage getting anything else. The people who make up these guidelines – talk about jobsworth. Being that fussy over rules and regulations, they should working as an operator on the chairlift at Dudley Zoo.
Cheers.
Nick
Antony N Britt - Author 